Exotic Dancing: 10 need to know things for the “baby” stripper

A great night starts with a good mindset, and a good mindset starts with healthy habits. Hydrate, eat a good healthy meal, stretch, and maybe sneak in some quick meditation. Stripping is both physically and mentally engaging, and without the right self care, can get exhausting and painful very quickly.

The more time you spend inside your head, the less likely it is that you will be successful in this industry. The key to it is to just do it! You won’t know if dancing is the right choice for you until you try it. Oftentimes us women get hung up on things like weight, breast size, or our own personal views of our physical appearance, and make excuses up in our minds about why we cannot go “today”. “I just need to lose 5 more lbs and I’ll go, or I need to learn some pole tricks first and I’ll go”. I will tell you from experience, men just love women, ALL women and different men like different types of ladies, you may be 5 lbs over weight to yourself but you’re the perfect body for Kevin. You may not be able to dance a lick but your eyes are able to hypnotize someone from across the room. You won’t know till you go! The hardest thing for a lot of us is just starting, but once you experience what it is to be sexually in control & confident in your own skin, you’ll see why a lot of us stay in the industry as long as we do!

I can’t stress enough the importance of a good pair of heels. “Well that’s easy, I have LOADS of shoes in my closet, I’ll just grab my sexiest pair of stilettos and hit the stage!” Right? Wrong. You can always pick out the baby stripper (newbie) by her shoes. And every single time, there she is sliding around the stage, trying to maintain her balance while simultaneously attempting to seductively drop it like its hot. Not a good look sis. From the grip on the bottom of the shoes, to the inches and arch of the heel, stripper shoes were designed specifically to fit the needs of a woman active on her feet for 4 plus hours. Many of the shoes are even designed to grip the pole. Remember there is no insurance plan offered by any of these clubs, so ensuring you have the right equipment is important for maintaining your own safety. Invest in a good pair of exotic shoes. Pleaser Shoes is the number one brand used by strippers and pole dancers everywhere. (pleasershoes.com)

Nothing wrong with researching the industry before heading out under the blacklight, But remember that you can’t learn EVERYTHING off of YouTube. You could watch 1000 pole videos, read 100 articles and talk to every dancer you know, but nothing will actually compare to real live experience. And inside an environment like the strip club, experience is absolutely the most dominant teacher.

It’s okay to be nervous, it’s natural when starting anything new, especially when that involves being naked or even partially naked in front of strangers. It’s expected. However, don’t ever let them see it. One of the keys to killing it in the club is to ACT like you’re killing it. Regardless of how you actually feel inside. People are drawn to confidence. Always maintain an air of self worth. I like to call it the ‘Bad bitch mindset’. When you’re at work, all the little insecurities you my have of yourself need to be gone. Walk around the place like you BELONG there. Approach men like you already KNOW they want you, because you are the baddest version of yourself. With all that said, keep in mind that bad nights still do happen, and sh*tty customers do exist, so don’t let a few bad nights or a couple rude men make you forget that you are the baddest!

People often forget that strippers are real live people too, with real live feelings. It’s sometimes easy for the customer to get lost in the fantasy and become a bit too much. When this happens, understand that you ALWAYS have the right to say no. This industry preys on the naivety of new young ladies, just due to the nature of the industry. Don’t allow someone (anyone, this includes other dancers and employees) to take advantage of you, whether its financially (paying you less than you deserve or not at all for your services) or sexually. (sexual harassment is still sexual harassment anywhere you go.) I find it makes things much easier when I lay out my own rules before the dance starts. (i.e no touching my bikini area, or keep your lips off me) That way there is no room for confusion when you stop the dance.

Most clubs you come across, have some form of house or stage fee. (Think of this like rent, you pay the club to allow you to use their building to run your business) These fee’s can range anywhere from 30 to 200 hundred dollars depending on the club. Make sure you find out what the clubs house fee is before you apply as oftentimes they will have you pay upfront. On top of house fee’s you have tip out. Now tip out is extremely important and will directly effect how your business looks inside the club. Some clubs have house moms (women who take care of the dancers usually in the locker room, they provide toiletries, perfume, wipes and sometimes even sell outfits) if your club has a house mom, make sure to tip before your shift starts and anytime you use any of her products. Along with the house moms, you have the bouncers and the DJ. The bouncers and DJ both will make you money if you make them money, they know the customers who are spending and can and most likely will direct you to them if you hook them up. The DJ directly effects your money more than (in my opinion) more than anyone else in the club, pay him well. A good rule of thumb is every time you have a good stage tip him. Also anytime he plays you a song you love tip him. A good relationship with the DJ can make or break you. Take care of him and he will play your best music, keep other ladies from stealing your songs (super important) hype you up before you get on stage or even throw you on the rotation more often on busy nights.

Sometimes it’s real easy to go overboard on the glitz and glam especially when entering the scene for the first time. Besides everyone knows strippers wear body glitter! Welp hate to break it to you, but wearing excessive make up and body glitters is the fastest way to ensure that no one will be buying any dances from you. Sure you may look great to yourself and your girlfriends, but you have to remember the strip club is not the place to dress up for you, you are dressing up for them. A lot of the men in there have not informed their wives of their whereabouts and do not want to come home and have to explain why they are covered in glitter and make up. No matter how beautiful and charismatic you are, men will absolutely avoid contact with you, and that’s the opposite of what we want here. And as for heavy make up? That’s always a no. Always. I’ve never in my years have had a man spend money on me because of my eye shadow. Keep in mind, men are in their to appreciate your beauty and body. This is not Vogue fashion week.

This is simple, the longer you work the more likely it is you will make money. The club is a give or take. Sometimes you get lucky and rack up with very little effort, other times you have to work the floor for 6 hours to break a couple hundred. The amount of effort you put in will dictate your income. Building up regular’s is extremely important because they will often save you from dead nights, however it is difficult to gain and keep regulars if you are never there. Establish a good home club, and work as often as you can manage, it’ll give customers a chance to get to know you and develop relationships with you inside the club, and it will give you the time and practice you need to hone in on your skills. Most clubs do have a minimum set hours you need to work (often 4 hours) and a minimum number of days during the week you’ll have to work in order to work the weekends (which obviously are the busier nights) keep this in mind when creating a daily schedule for yourself and allow yourself time in between to regroup and heal. Which brings me to my last point.

Or better yet, take a break! It’s easy to get caught up in the lifestyle of an exotic dancer, and forget just how important it is to step back and take a break. This type of work can be both physically and mentally draining, and if you don’t pace yourself, you are heading straight for the dreaded “burnout”. Give yourself time in between heavy shifts to relax, take a few days off work after a busy week. Save money for a vacation and just get away. I cannot stress the importance of self care in this industry. This is a job, but remember you have the freedom to choose your own schedule for the most part, with good money management and good self care, choosing to dance may become one of the most liberating decisions you’ve ever made! But never forget it is okay and absolutely necessary to take a break!